i hate school. School is the only spoiler in my life now. Without school, i think my life would be perfect.

During secondary school time, i used to yearn and hope and wish that poly could come faster. Because i thought that entering poly means i've grown up. but hell i was wrong. I wished time didn't pass so fast. Or rather i wished after secondary 4, i'll go back to sec 1 days but time goes by as usual. Seriously i think i'm mad.

School sucks. i really can't think of any other words to describe it. It's like it's being a big fat bitch throwing lemons at me. & no matter how fast i try to pick those lemons up and squeeze it into lemonade, it's still faster than me. i think i can be a storywriter already. i swear i hate lemons T.T

i'm trying my bestest best already. My hardest best. But still, everyone's still not satisfied with me. I try my best not to give up, not to breakdown and cry. But it's like everyone is bent on seeing me cry. Everyone's like piling all their weights on my shoulder, pushing me underground until i can't breathe then i die.

idk what to do. i wna quit school. but what would dad & mom say? what would my relatives think of my parents? what would his parents think of me? what would his relatives think of me? would they feel that i'm not compatible with him? would my relatives look down on my parents? would my parents be disappointed with me? Most importantly, will he be disappointed with me?

i feel so suffocated. i really do.